Reblogged from A visual journey to the inside of Silvino González:
“The man’s body is sacred, and the woman’s body is sacred; No matter who it is, it is sacred; Is it a slave? Is it one of the dull-faced immigrants just landed on the wharf? Each belongs here or anywhere, just as much as the well-off—just as much as you; Each has his or her place in the procession.”
Leaves of grass.
There was some kind of festival in the streets when I returned. The pedestrian mall was a thick gauntlet of people wearing assorted costumes, some obviously homemade, others more authentic and elaborate, and none of them with any discernible unified pattern or theme. There were live bands strategically placed across the walkway playing all types of music, there were jugglers and fire-breathers, cowboy contortionists and dancing Saint Nicks, the throng thick and fluid and jovial in the midday sun. There were women dressed as brides and holding giant margarita-filled glasses, a crowd of policewomen in short shorts, a huge marijuana smoking koala bear, a man on stilts wearing nothing but an inflatable donut, women in bikinis, tanned college girls in lingerie, an Eskimo, The Beatles, two or three different men dressed up as Philip Marlowe or Sam Spade, all of them holding some type of drink, most of them in plastic cups of assorted colors and sizes. I asked a fireman if he was a real fireman or a fake fireman and he said, Are you a real triathlete or a fake triathlete, and I didn’t know what he meant so I said, What’s going on here, man, what’s the occasion for this party? He looked around and pushed his fire hat back on his head and said, I’ve got no idea. He handed me a cup of beer and I took it, riding slowly down the walkway. The smell of grilled meat and spices floated about my head and a roaring cheer burst up from the walkway a block down. I made my way over there, past the old women bumblebees, through the arching balloons, a cover band playing a tune from the Zombies, past Ichabod Crane dancing the tango with Margaret Thatcher, past the cast of Reservoir Dogs playing cards at a folding table, I walked through a choking-thick cloud of marijuana smoke that brought me immediately back to the shadows beneath the Santa Monica pier and I shuddered so violently the cup of beer fell from my hand. Down toward the other end of the mall people were assembled in a giant circle cheering on a wizard and a David Hasselhoff look-a-like break dancing in the middle. The band up on the nearby stage was dressed up as the Jimi Hendrix Experience but they were playing Fight For Your Right by the Beastie Boys and I felt very happy but very confused. I noticed a man standing in the doorway of a deli, smoking a cigarette and watching the phenomenon in the walkway and I walked my bicycle toward him. What’s going on here? I asked him. A festival, or something?
This ain’t no festival, he said indignantly. This type a shit happens all the time. Then he threw the cigarette butt past me and walked into his shop and closed the door. The band stopped playing and the people cheered. A man wearing a brown colonial wig and a Denver Broncos jersey said very loudly: Everybody listen up!
He handed out yellow pamphlets at random, to anyone who would take one. I reached out for one but the man was too far away. He turned and said something to the members of the band and soon he was up on the stage with the microphone in his hand. This ain’t your momma’s America, my friends, he said, his voice booming from the speakers. A few people cheered, others booed, someone next to me said, Now who the fuck is this guy? Someone in front yelled for the man to shut up but still everyone began to listen to what he was about to say, their eyes down in their pamphlets, the speaker’s face scanning the crowd in front of him.
This should be a party for homeless people, he said. They’re all around you. Go ahead, take a look.
The crowd grew quiet.
Or maybe it should be a party for Mexicans. They’re not hard to find, either. Tell em, say, thank you, sir, or thank you, ma’am. Go ahead, you know you want to. Deep down, you know you really want to.
Whispers. A few boos. A handful of cheers.
I’m not talking about these gang bangers with broken English, rags on their heads, shooting up restaurants and killing cops. No sir. No way. I’m not talking about the guys who get drunk and drive their pickups onto the sidewalks, killing children. They’re not contributing anything to society except fear and regret. No sir. I’m not talking about the rapists, the sex offenders looking at every chick that walks by, the perverts dressed in their cheap black threads, no sir. No way. I’m talking about our friends, the real, the worthy Mexican immigrants, the workers, the proletariat—
Shut the fuck up, someone yelled.
—the people in the shadows, the invisibles that make this white utopia of privilege possible.
Then everyone was listening. The salsa dancers and 1980’s revivalists, the homeless men and women huddled in the alleyway and dressed as themselves, the musicians and street performers, the real police situated thin and random throughout the crowd. Everyone stopped talking and laughing, everyone except the college boys dressed up as disco kings or pimps or 1970’s basketball players, shouting, Yeeeaahh!, because to them everything is a party, everything has to be a party, and the man said:
Many of you think you’re oppressed, many of you think you can feel the weight of power burying you deep into your featherbeds, your comfort zones, the things you work hard for and earn, the things you were handed, whatever. Your things. You’re feeling buried by the power structures, the elite, the unmentionable dangers your leftist teachers warned you about.
Shouts for the man to get off the stage, for the band to start playing music again.
They’ve rendered your weapons innocuous. Government, media, corporate greed. Your lives no longer take live ammunition; they only spit plastic darts.
Shouts for the crowd to overtake him, shouts from the college boys.
Plastic darts. You know what a plastic dart is? It’s freedom-proof, that’s what. Just like the ones they supply at the university up the street.
People chuckled. Someone threw a ball of white yarn up onto the stage and the band’s guitar player picked it up and threw it back into the crowd. I set down the bike and moved my way closer to the stage and reached out for one of the yellow pamphlets.
Don’t listen to a word I’m saying, he said. Don’t listen to me, no sir. No way. Just look in the mirror. Look hard, like you’re trying to look past it.
More people shouted for him to get off the stage and the college boys told him to go fuck himself, which only seemed to make the man more confident, give him more presence. A few people walked away, clowns and a princess, a tiger and a human lighthouse. Scattered boos growing thicker, more prominent.
Your so-called education leaves you feeling fully locked and loaded, doesn’t it, he said into the microphone. You feel like you’ve developed an arsenal of weapons in your mind, like you’ve got something other than plastic darts to shoot. But let me tell you something, my friends. You’ve got nothing. No-thing. Plastic, fucking, darts. Because if you really looked in the mirror you’d see that you were the oppressor, not the oppressed. Thinking you’re oppressed, held down, obstructed, impeded, this gives you an excuse as to why you’re not productive, why you’re not doing anything with your lives.
—Fuck you, man!
—Let’ get some music, I came here to dance!
—What is this guy even talking about?
—Holy shit, something’s in my eye. Is there something in my eye? Oh my god, oh my god.
A few people clapped. I stood there motionless. Something was about to happen, I could feel it in the air, growing hot with the sun angled slightly toward the mountains in the cloudless blue. I looked around for the police and didn’t even see any fake ones.
You gave all your weapons away and now they’re using em against you. You gave them to your enemies, for them to use against you—
—Somebody get him off—
—and now you’ve got nothing but third and fourth generation rifles tucked under your arm and they don’t even fire, they’ve been stripped from the captives, the indigenous, and used to beat their owners, you, the lucky and sun-splashed oppressors, the horde chosen to annihilate the true chosen ones, the African-Americans, the American Indians, the Mexican-Americans, the Vietnamese-Americans, all of us, you and me, the recycled dead—
—I’m gonna kick your fuckin hippie ass, said a college kid close to the stage.
Ladies and gentlemen, the speaker said. Look at this sad young man. He pointed at the college kid just below him. One of their cowardly hit men! In the flesh!
The crowd around the college kid thickened and he got up on the stage with the speaker. He was taller and much bigger but the speaker didn’t appear to be intimidated at all, he was actually more calm and also more willing to agitate the young man, who, according to the estimation of the speaker, had already made two mistakes: the first was saying anything to the speaker at all, and the second was climbing up on the stage, because now a physical confrontation was inevitable and it wasn’t just between himself and the speaker, he was confronting the speaker and the entire crowd, who would invariably second-guess his every decision, his every gesture and expression, they would mock and ridicule him if (when) he made the wrong move, the incorrect decision, and the speaker was prepared to face the college kid’s barrage of fists and kicks to the face, he was prepared to get thrown off the stage because, to him, this would justify his message, it would solidify his place in the party’s lore, in the history of this town and his cause, it would render his little personal and unprepared speech true, even if he wasn’t sure what he was talking about, and the college boy knew all of these things as he stepped toward the speaker with adrenaline coursing jagged through his system, he knew all of these things and more, including that this situation could not end well for him, it would not end well for him, it was impossible, because somehow he had surrendered power and control to this hippie asshole and now he was forced to react either with force or humor, the latter being almost entirely impracticable, as his body was primed for physical confrontation more than anything else, and then he thought he could simply walk away and risk being derided, booed by the bloodthirsty onlookers, fodder for the jackass with the pamphlets, and the college kid said, Who the fuck do you think you are?, which was the entirely wrong move despite the young man’s conviction that it was right, it was the only move, and in a flash he no longer cared he was on a moving billboard, bullet train to nowhere, his front-row seat with a prime view of the carnage.
I’m your friend, man, the speaker said into the microphone, and reached out to put his hand gently on the college kid’s shoulder, and the young man slapped the speaker’s hand away and the speaker raised his hand with the microphone in it and the young man head-butted the speaker, knocking him backward a few steps, blood spraying outward from the speaker’s face in a fine mist, and for a brief second a few of the spectators thought it was all a joke, the speech, the confrontation, all of it a ruse, because these two were actually friends, classmates in the drama school, and they were nearing the end of this charade, where, with a hug and a bow, they would exit the stage one after the other to the applause and amazement of the crowd, but what actually happened was far less fortunate, for the college kid charged the speaker, wounded and dazed still by the head butt, and swung a ferocious right haymaker into the face of the speaker, who, if he weren’t knocked immediately unconscious, would have experienced a full two seconds of total weightlessness as he flew backwards off the stage and into the crowd, his sleeping body bouncing abruptly on the concrete, and the pamphlets swung up into the air, hundreds of folded yellow papers raining down upon the city block stunned into silence save for the sharp inhalation of disbelievers and the razor-electric hum of microphone feedback, and it was almost celebratory how the pamphlets floated and flipped back down to earth in slow motion, atop the concrete and the heads of onlookers watching rapt and excited and yet disappointed that cooler heads couldn’t have prevailed, some spectators walking away from the scene to refill their cups, smiling or indifferent, others swearing under their breath at the irreverence of the human condition, the young man’s friends cheering him, praising his actions. A woman dressed as a witch kneeled down to soothe the speaker back toward consciousness, back toward the light from whence he came, and he woke slowly, bloodily, with a grimace as if from some painful nightmare that was not physical nor at all dreamlike, and the college kid stood watching from the stage with fire in his eyes despite the flood of regret seeping into him, and nobody stopped him from jumping from the stage and running from the scene, the block, our lives, the sun ducking for relief behind the clouds.
To read this chapter in its entirety, you’ll have to wait for the novel to be published

Beyond the windows the city suffocates and inside the airport an improvised social order has emerged, people placing themselves in like company within the first few hours, migrating either toward others or slinking from them, watching suspiciously. The snow continues its relentless entombment, mountains of snow, so much snow that it seems like a joke, a cataclysm and a joke. Families cluster and gravitate together, a kindred alliance in the struggle to raise children in such an unpredictable world. The erudite, greatly outnumbered, concede space to the philistines, retreating to their darkened corners where they can read or sleep in peace. Lonely travelers linger about the fringes of the terminal and three concourses, sitting in bars desperate to spread the microbe of random discussion. Outside the world is gray and cold and buried in fifty, perhaps sixty inches of snow and ice but inside travelers of exotic speech and color band together and sit against the walls with their luggage next to them, the contents unfolded and unused.
Situated throughout the entire airport there are precisely 891 people, 28 of which are reading books, 41 reading magazines. Only one of those books would be considered by bibliophiles and some librarians, not to mention teachers and many linguists and of course writers and readers of particularly rigid standards, to be a great work, and it sits open faced to pages 384 and 385 on the lap of its sleeping lord. Five hundred and twelve people attend non-literary electronic devices such as television or portable phones and music players and video games. Among the sources of such rapt attention are popular films and pre-recorded sporting events downloaded onto small digital screens. Fifty-four people throughout the airport at this late hour are engaged in dialogue with other people or with themselves, speaking at this very moment, 30 of which are connected to their partner via cellular satellite. Forty-nine adults are staring into the screen of their mobile computers, reading, studying, communicating, formulating their private mathematical balances, chatting on their preferred discussion boards, all of them drunk with fatigue and boredom after two days of near complete immobility. Four children run in circles of Gate 3C, chasing one another and yelping gleefully. A dog sleeps snoring in its plastic cage, another metaphor for the ennui that defines this frozen city in miniature. Two women kiss very passionately in a secluded corner of gate 21A and a young man smokes a cigarette in the bathroom stall in concourse B, fanning unsuccessfully at the smoke with his hands. Of the 412 people fast asleep, 408 of them are dreaming about death.
In the terminal of the airport an impressionable young man has filled his head with ideas of revolution and armed struggle and other romanticized concepts he doesn’t fully understand and yet he’s certain he’s carrying with him all sorts of mental weaponry and knowledge, he’s enlightened, he is the guns of his generation locked and loaded and primed for destruction, and he gets into a bickering match with a much older and equally obstinate man about the difference between Republicans and Democrats, or maybe it was Catholics and Protestants or perhaps warm water and tepid water, and the confrontation of words quickly escalates into shoving and pulling and then rolling about the carpet and two armed guards intervene and haul the fighting men into the underground lair in the belly of the terminal, and government men in suits interrogate them one by one for hours, nearly torturing them, and the revolutionary, or the self-proclaimed revolutionary, rather, begins sobbing under the pressure and he tells the suited government men that he needs to speak with his mother, please, just leave me alone, I just wanna go home.
There is a doctor in the terminal, actually there are two doctors. One of them waits patiently and attentive in wait until his services are needed, the other sleeps with avowed designs of concealing from everyone the fact that he is indeed a trained doctor. He will not deliver any babies tonight, no sir, and no matter what, he will not put his mouth upon another’s and breathe, breathe, unless it’s the soft sugary mouth of an attractive woman, perhaps even a teenage girl with glossed lips and the tiniest of blonde hairs rimming her mouth. He smiles and his hips shift and then thrust slightly as he sleeps.
To read the story in its entirety, you’re gonna have to buy the book when it comes out.

Sometimes I recall those memories of my father and me in his garage and view them cinematically. Jutting images of deep emotional warmth, close-up frames of his pallid head, his face folding in wrinkled gaiety. The stories we shared were the background music of our film. Quaint abstract close-up of my fingers holding a cigarette, smoke rising in creeping braids, the lens focusing past the smoke to my father’s face, his head bent forward in meditation, listening. In the garage we were safe. The world had its troubles, its violence and fakery, its small-mindedness. Our world was in the garage beneath the bright fluorescent glow, it was the two of us learning, reaching into parts of ourselves and pulling out the truths, extending them out for the other to take and digest. The garage was retreat, lectern, prayer room. I view those deep moments in montage, powerful imagery flashing about the screen of my mind, the moments before the credits roll up from the disconnected abyss.
Then in the garage one Saturday afternoon he collapsed to the ground and couldn’t move. His legs wouldn’t support him. He was conscious but his brain wasn’t communicating with his limbs. The overhead door was opened wide to the sunshine. I’ll never forget his face, that expression of shock, understanding, submission, helpless analysis. My father knew in that instant that he had been beaten by his own mortality. It had stepped in front of him and choked him down. How sudden and jarring death claims our attention. How strange to be alive and commanding one moment, a sycophant the next. He saw the rest of his life spread out thinly before him, the decay, the mindlessness, the vibrato and stink of his organs shutting down. He realized in that flashing madness that he wouldn’t live another month.
I helped him to his feet while my stepmother called the hospital. He was still stunned in silent thought. I could see the fear and awe on his face. He knew he was looking straight into the heart of that wide visceral truth. He thought he had envisioned it, he told himself repeatedly that he was ready. As I set him in his folding chair and lit him a cigarette, he realized he hadn’t even known what ready meant.
Just before my stepmother drove the two of them out of the garage and down the driveway to my father’s sun-soaked reckoning, I took off my necklace and placed it in his hand. He was almost too weak to hang on to it. I said I would meet them at the hospital and watched them drive away, the car shrinking away from me into the luminous maw, my hand where my chain had been and that naked, vulnerable feeling there.

My editor called me into his office and when I got there I could hardly see him behind the great stacks of paper on his desk. I want you to go to Las Vegas to cover the race riots, he said. What race riots, I said.
“Don’t you read the papers?”
There’s nothing in our paper about any race riots or anything in Las Vegas, I said. Not our newspaper, he said, a real newspaper, our paper is shit, and I nodded and drove to the airport in the dizzying heat wondering why he sent me to cover race riots when my beat was local government. I stopped at the airport newsstand and bought copies of all the major dailies across the country and then I started to think about how hot Las Vegas was going to be, sweating, the shimmering heat vapor, and the thought made me very tired. I got on the airplane and once we took off I began leafing through the various newspapers looking for the story about the riots in Vegas and I didn’t see anything. Hate crimes in Georgia, a school shooting in Des Moines. Death in Denver. An airplane crash in Beijing, all eight hundred aboard dead, and I thought it was impossible to fit that many people on a plane, but then again you learn something new every day. Broadsheets and tabloids crinkled and folded, my hands stained black from the ink. Nothing about Las Vegas, nothing about race riots.
When we landed I called my editor and told him that I checked all the papers and there was nothing about Vegas or any riots. Well you’re there, he said, start asking around. What races are rioting, anyway, I said, but he had already hung up. And what are they rioting about, I said to the dead line.
I checked into a cheap motel and showered and turned on the local television to see if I could land any mention of my assignment, but there was nothing about any races or riots in the Vegas area, and I lied down and told myself I could afford a few minutes of rest before making calls and before I knew it I was dreaming of time and madness and I couldn’t convince myself they were two distinct things, I dreamed of open sores and boils on the skin and that my brain was baking slowly inside my skull and I dreamed of bruises and lost loves and poetry written on walls with giant brushes made from the hair of dead babies, and then I dreamed of race riots in Cleveland, race riots in Vancouver, race riots in Buenos Aires, race riots everywhere except Las Vegas, and in the dream I was running, I was always running, a guerilla journalist looking for racial strife and other violence but also the hidden meaning behind news terms like nut graph and lede and kicker. Then I dreamed I was coughing and I didn’t know why until I put on my glasses and noticed the air was hazy with pink and red and I realized I was breathing vaporized blood, choking me, and there was a terrible taste in my mouth that wouldn’t go away. I tried to wake myself up but I just fell deeper into the dream and there was a dancing woman, a woman trained in classical ballet and she was twirling and spinning and contorting her body in myriad ways and it was fascinating, mesmerizing, hypnotic, and then I noticed her hair was on fire, her head leaving a smoky trail wherever it dipped or glided and swung, and then the woman stopped dancing and stared at me with her hair on fire and her eyes mad and she said she could see death everywhere, she could see death on television and in the malls, she could see it emerging from the crowds in the street, she could see it in the jumbled letters of newsprint, she could see it in elevators and on the subway and she could see that death knew she saw it and it didn’t care, it didn’t try to hide the fact that it was death and not just some strange or ominous thing, and she said that death was neither a male nor a female presence but completely androgynous, and I told her that made sense and she got angry with me and said I could never understand something as beautifully complex as death and then she walked away, muttering under hear breath as her head melted. I imagined that death probably looked like a man or a fish or even a church, and somehow I knew that I was not afraid of death regardless of its appearance. Then I dreamed of Haitian kids creating rainbows out of feet fungus and I dreamed of people machine gunning their own in the streets of some strange country, I dreamed of closing doors and baritone saxophone players with their eyes closed and their bodies writhing with their improvised emotive forces, and then I dreamed of race riots in Pamplona, race riots in Seattle, race riots in Las Cruces, I dreamed of worms, I dreamed of giant brown worms with legs like humans who stood upright like humans, wormus erectus, and I dreamed the worms were bred to commit suicide at a particular age and I thought it tragically out of their control, the suicide gene written into their slimy genetic code, I dreamed of all the pain in the world condensed and concentrated into one small room, and then I dreamed of time travel.
To read the story in its entirety, you’re gonna have to buy the book when it comes out.